Fred goes shopping and is dazzled by the return of color for spring

Sunglasses off and on again,

No more will I look like a little brown wren

For color is back 

And neon's the new black!

I just have to learn how to refer

To the various components of this incandescent blur:

Blue is green and green is yellow,

Gray is bright, chartreuse is mellow,

Dusty Rose is shocking pink,

Rosy Taupe - light brown, you'd think -

But no, look at my mismatched clothes,

Rosy Taupe is Dusty Rose!

Mossy Taupe is Burnt Sienna,

Desert Earth was Weathered Henna,

But now it's closer to Army Green

Or Vintage Bronze or Baby Breen,

Which is what the army wears when it goes out to dance 

In camofleur chiffon and military pixie pants.

A cheerful gray, a merry puce,

A winemaker's nightmare of Burgundy Fog,

Come, lift a glass to Faded Sky,

Heather Slate, Yellow Clay and eight shades of salmon.

Another glass, another glass, these shades are jammin'

Tomorrow I'll have to grab an outfit on the fly,

Try as I may, I can't deduce

What I'm wearing without a shot of the hair of the dog.

With regret, the verse stops here,

Not that more colors couldn't appear,

But nothing rhymes with orange.

Footnote: see also this post.