Muffy explains it all. Thank you, Muffy. Have some W's.

Do you know Muffy Aldrich? Oh, she is wicked and witty and wise and wonderful. Dorothy Parker is supposed to have moaned that every time she had a witty thought, she'd find that Oscar Wilde had already said it. I often feel that way about Muffy's ineffable blog, The Daily Prep , and today I recognized that feeling in connection with the post to which that link will bring you. Muffy has translated contemporary retail-speak into English, and many of us will bless her for it or at least chuckle.

Here are some examples:

Inspired by Maine	Made in China.
Inspired by fall in Maine	Inspired by our year-end bonuses.
Inspired by New England	We stole the design from Walmart, slapped lighthouses on it, named it after a New England town, and tripled the price. You're welcome.
Inspired by our archives	But obviously, if we just copied our archives, we wouldn't be able to make our now customary 5X markup and our CEO would not be happy.

And here Muffy translates the Copywriter from Space:

Preppy with a twist	For people who want to pretend they don't dress the same as everyone else.
Preppy cool	Urban fashion train wreck, with just a hint of tartan.

Classic with a twist

The twist is, it's not classic at all. Save it for Halloween, 2017.  You'll thank us later.

Muffy is a great believer in moderation and in avoiding the infra dig, and so I think that's why she didn't stoop to translate OBSESSED and EFFORTLESS. 

I, of course, am shameless, and my view of the CFS' use of effortless is that she just doesn't know what it means. I think she's going for studied, but that's because in our house effortless attire means a bathrobe and a hairclip, accompanied by cries of "Can you get that? I can't find my glasses." Studied, naturally, means I remembered to check for fallen hems and stuck zippers.

I have different feelings about being an obsessed shopper, because to me shopping is a form of research and I am dogged. Dogged, I tell you. Whether research (in other areas) is really shopping by another name is, of course, a question of ethics, and I leave that to those more gainfully employed than I. 

But once you've been properly fitted for a bra and appear 2 inches taller and 3 inches slimmer, once you've found the shade of taupe that makes your eyes look green not muddy, once you've identified the shoe that inconspicuously takes you through the day without causing wincing -  you might allow yourself a little perseverance, too.  Of course giving way to these and other obsessions is enabled by living in the midst of stores in an apartment equipped with wireless. In the days when retail websites were primitive, I once called a manufacturer (California) to find out if a particular reversible jacket of theirs - double faced cashmere - was sold anywhere in New York City or on Long Island. They kindly gave me a few names, one was a small boutique not far from me. I called and got this: "What's it your business what I sell and when I'm open?" Yes, I learned in a tough school. 

Here is where I point out that there's one more element to the equation of obsessed + ______ = effortless. The missing ingredient is Fate.  The silk blouse that perfectly matches the wool skirt must have come back from the cleaners. The pants that felt a little tight last week must be fine now after 3 days of rabbit food. The sweater must not have decided to grow pills overnight. And with the stars in alignment, one goes to the closet, pulls out a few things with eyes closed…

How do you define effortless? What are your obsessions? And of course, what are your favorite Inbox Translations? Not to mention Fate….

And of course, thank you, Muffy.