I hope he'll stay put if disaster strikes, because the roads that connect the South Fork of Long Island with the Rest of the World are world-famous for heavy traffic and lengthy back-ups; summer, rain, spot floods and thick ground fog only add to the charm. They are also festively decorated with signs that read "Hurricane Evacuation Route" or sometimes just "Evacuation Route." And the county's official Hurricane Preparedness Guide suggests keeping your passport with you!
I want to buy a hat or two for the coming fall/winter season, and I have to start trying on shoes. This must happen as early as possible because cute hats that actually fit my Very Large Head are rare beasts indeed. One size fits all is not a true statement. One size fits most is equally non-inclusive. Take it from me, a shoe in a Medium width will need stuffing on me, and a size L or even L/XL hat - isn't. In the days when a Lady didn't leave home without a hat, how could one avoid being forever housebound? I put this to my Oldest Living Female Relative, who explained:
Women's hats once came in sizes based on the diameter of your head. If you had a large head, you would buy, oh, a 22 ½ or 22¾.She continued:
In fact, most women's articles once were specifically sized. Shoes came in widths from AAAAA to D. You could also find shoes with a "combination last," for example, a shoe with a AA heel and a B rest of the shoe. Shirts came in real sizes, none of this S-M-L. Nylon stockings came in real sizes. Sweaters came in sizes 30 to 38. Socks came in numbered sizes, and you measured your sock size by wrapping the sock, heel to toe, around your fist. If it just met, that was your size.She went on, you wouldn't think such a sweet old bat could convey such ire.
Compare buying a woman's shirt in a size S with buying a man's shirt, where you need to know his collar size in ¼ inch increments and his sleeve length in ½ inch increments. Men's belts are also available in inches. Men's shoes are still made in a great choice of widths.Where, oh, where, can one find this degree of over-the-counter specificity in women's articles? OLFR blushingly replied, "Well, dear, one place is in the brassière department." This is true - cup and band. Anywhere else? More blushes: "Not at my age, dear, but I understand they are still considered fairly reliable protection."
I guess if the fit of what you wear is really, really important to the people who - in reality - control the manufacture and marketing of women's articles, you can find it really well sized. And if your shoes pinch, take them off and lie down.
Um, I just thought of a product for men that is available in sizes from Gigantic to Unbelievable.