reviews I stop reading

No mistake, I love user reviews. When something catches my eye, I love learning what others think, what others' experiences have been. I've been looking at spring shoes. I am not going to buy shoes that "are not as uncomfortable as last year's flats." Please. The only shoes that are entitled to be uncomfortable are the rubbery flip-flops you bought from a street vendor when you stopped the car beachside on impulse.

I don't think I learn what the happy purchaser was thinking from reviews like "not all that bad for the money." For something meant to be worn in front of people?

Shoe reviews are the most dubious -- "ok for work if you spend most of the day sitting at a desk.""my brown suede ones
hurt more." Uh, what's the point of spending $225 on a pair of shoes and then another $15 on drug-store insoles and arch supports to help you get home?

Of a skirt: "really cute if you don't need to bend over." ok, got it.

Of a coat: "if you're planning to wear it in winter be sure to buy a size larger than usual to have room for a sweater." Or you could just buy a warmer coat.

Nevertheless, I am grateful to these reviewers. They may be hiding behind a desire to seem nice, but they certainly get the point across.

My all-time favorite user review was of a crib being sold by Target: "My wife and I assembled this for over 3 hours before we called her brother to us pack it up to take it back to the store. Most of it fit in the box. We are still married, but it was tense for a while." Well, I like this guy's style, and if he ever buys another crib, I'd like to watch him assembling it. While wearing cute but really uncomfortable shoes. With any luck, I'll be able to relax in a chair that they bought fully assembled.

My sister is still bemoaning her experience with a piece of furniture she bought from West Elm. Seems they included all the parts and all the tools and all the directions, but one essential item was missing -- the "other adult" to hold the thing up while the "first adult" tightened the screws.


  1. This. Is. Hilarious. I love that crib review too! I've read some reviews on Amazon that I thought were worthy of forwarding through emails to friends... can't recall now though.

  2. Glad you stopped by, glad you enjoyed!


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