birthday loot, chapter one

I cringe when people say cheerful and complimentary things about my Leo birthday. To me, growing up, an August birthday was one of the loneliest days of the year. My friends were away on summer vacations, at camp, visiting family, adventure travel. My family would have finished any summer adventures that were on the calendar for that year, so that we'd be home in plenty of time to get ready for the coming school year. Birthday presents from family centered on their expectations from me for that year: an overly fancy diary to copy assignments into, a metronome to practice with, an enormous gum eraser to help me learn that everybody makes mistakes, sensible shoes... A few crazy albums or a cute sweater from friends would have been a big help, but when you're at drama camp or on an island off the Maine coast, maybe you'll think to send a card. Or maybe you won't.  Learned early on, you can't keep friends if you can't make allowances.

Himself is not a shopper. In fact, he's frightened of stores. I don't know what his mother and grandmother did to him, but whatever it was, they did it in stores. His idea of browsing while we travel is to drive at 40 or 50 mph down, say, Rue St Honoré or the Promenade des Anglais, late at night, and point - while driving! while driving! - at windows that are still lit. I think he's not alone in his male shopping dread. I've often observed men enter Brooks Brothers on Madison Avenue (conveniently located near J.Crew), and stand still just inside the front door. Staff is used to this. Kind Salesman will approach and ask if he may be of service. Frozen Customer makes gurgly noises. Oh, says KS, shirts? More gurgles. KS returns with a few blue, a few white. FC defrosts a little and points....

So I've learned that since he's basically a generous soul, I need to tell him (a) that I am having a birthday again this year; (b) as indeed I have one every year; (c) on the same date; and (d) he needs to get me thus-and-such. If I'm feeling particularly kindly, I'll offer to go to the store myself and pick it up. Sad but true. I focus on his other good qualities.

And as to celebrations: people still go away, close up, vanish for August. When we feel that a year is worth celebrating, we follow the example of HRH Queen Elizabeth, whose real birthday is in February when most of England is closed, but who celebrates toward the end of June, when a lot of Brits are out of hibernation.

So who commemorates my lonely August birthday? Relatives, with calls and cards. And stores. Sometimes sufficiently in advance to allow for planning! I plan to update this post as things arrive, but here's what came in yesterday's mail:

                     Discount card from Bendels,
                     with birthday wishes

                     Discount card from Anthropologie, in
                     cute package, with birthday wishes

                     Small but thoughtful gift certificate from
                     Bloomie's (have forgiven them), with birthday wishes

                     Postcard from J.Crew, reporting that Rock Center
                     is open for business again. No discount, no wishes.

Hmm, what's wrong with this picture? Oh, well. What do you like/dislike about your birthday?