And after having just read this in Madison Avenue Spy, I believe that this little Song of Praise is even more à propos than it was when I first posted it. Feel free to sing along.
The night was dark,
The girls wore schmattas,
And the prices kept going up.
Oh, Leader Dear, we sing to you
You brought us stripes on white and blue
You thought up tee shirts, jeans and blouses,
Long distance, from one of your many houses.
From furs and fig leaves you have brought us
-- as your PR folks have taught us --
To synthetic blends which, though not better,
Make a cheap and disposable sweater.
The mystery metals you invented
Brought bling unto the golfing classes,
Do we really look better represented
In socks with heels and nerdy glasses?
To you we owe the vest of feathers,
The raincoat that can't go out in wet weather,
To you, the Twig, the Moss, the Heather,
And elastic-waisted shorts of leather.
Dear Leader, it's to you we turn
When for sleeveless coats we yearn,
For brocade shorts, for sequined maxis
Too costly to be worn in taxis.
You heard our prayers and brought back color,
(though seam allowances are smaller),
May your neons ever brightly burn
(though pilly cashmere we'll still spurn.)
Crown him with a wreath of laurel,
His brow with precious oils annoint,
With success there is no quarrel,
When all else fails, just raise the price point.