on compliments

The amazing Jody of About Last Weekend recently asked "What was the nicest thing your husband ever said to you?"

Lengthy pause for thought here, because Himself (despite the nickname) does not come from a long line of articulate persuasive people. He was the only son of doting, possessive parents, which in practical terms means they never corrected him and he never had to ask for anything, because they were so thrilled even to have had A Child, let alone one who got good grades and was mostly kind and even-tempered, and so he grew up to be a Caveman. A nice one, but a Caveman.

Plus I am always telling him not to speak with food in his mouth, which is a lot of the time, so even if he has had a random compliment or two to offer I probably didn't catch them as they were muffled - by some of the finest food on the face of the earth, true, but muffled.
And yet, and yet… somehow on a certain fateful day I recognized his sterling qualities, and he's always made me laugh, and I love his sense of whimsy, and it's been an adventure, and, and

and one day we were watching a tv program documenting the reunions of beloved folk groups of the 50s and 60s, and an elderly woman was being interviewed. She had flowing white hair, winged eyebrows, large round eyes, pointed chin… and just as I caught myself happily thinking that I would probably look like her in another few decades, Himself remarked "What a nice-looking woman, she must have been drop-dead stunning when she was younger."

So if he would only try not to put his fingers in his plate, he might be perfect.

22 comments:

  1. Love this! My hubs is pretty mute on the subject himself. I think I've scared him with some of my reactions to his observations:-)

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  2. It's a wise woman who recognizes her man's sterling qualities and accepts those he does not have rather than trying to force change on him. Given circumstances around his upbringing, the fact that he found someone as wonderful as you who measured up well enough to become his wife is quite a compliment in itself.

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  3. Gaw, this is hard. Does groping, fondling, and annoying me by doing the aforementioned count?

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  4. I had the good fortune of marrying a very good man. We met at 18 and married at a very young age. Having children reach that age, I ask myself, "What could we have been thinking?" But we chose well. These many years later he tells me and just about anybody else he talks to that I am the best he could have ever hoped for in life. So despite the near daily onslaught of the UPS man he remains steadfast. I am indeed lucky.

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  5. I also have one who makes me laugh and he's also incredibly clever and kind. And he thinks he's the lucky one because he has me!!? Naturally, I just let him keep thinking that!

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  6. He'll appreciate you big time! So cute.

    I married someone who talks more than I do, is very expressive, like switched roles.

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  7. Aw, Fred, Himself is climbing up the ladder to be a part of the fan club we have going on for Wendy's Barry and Blue Booby's Hunter! My husband is pretty perfect, and he makes me fall in love with him constantly. The other day, we were watching the finale of What not to Wear, and when he finally understood how empowered these women felt after their makeovers he looked at me with tears in his eyes and told me how beautiful and powerful he thinks this show is, and how important it is for these women to have regained their self confidence. Isn't that something? He jokes and says that he is going to "come out" one of these days (he loves to cook and loves home goods and interior decorating), but I'm with BB, with all the groping, I doubt it. He is a total boob man. Ok, now I'm done with the TMI.

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    1. Oh, I dunno, there's a lot to be said for groping..

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  8. I don't remember the nicest thing Primo has ever said to me, although I do appreciate his response to my pinching my inch by telling me that "You look good to me, sweetie." I do, however, remember his flying from Milwaukee to Memphis after I had told him I wanted a dating break just so he could repair my washing machine, the demise of which I had written about in my blog and he had read about.

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  9. Very sweet! I love it when our future elderly selves are the topic of loving comments. And sometimes the best statements are expressed by a look in their eyes...

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    1. Hi, TDGD, as long as that look isn't hidden by glasses that are fogged up from bending over hot plates...

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